(untitled)

Yes, I am titling this blog as untitled.
Right now, I am experiencing difficulty doing a lot of things... even such a small thing as putting a title on a single blog entry.  I know that I am in this state because I am being like Narcissus.  I am being too self-focused and not God-focused.  My mind is just so bogged down with the copious things I have to do per day, and as such, my mind and body likes to default into an idle state. Quite ironic?  Oh, please Father, allow me to focus my eyes on you and fear you.  Everything else will just follow.

Lately, I feel so foreign in my own body.  Foreign in that the things that used to make me sad or leave me broken do not affect me with their usual severity.  I also am not as enthusiastic or as joy-filled as I was before.  I just feel like I wake up every day and go about the day... to find myself in the same place, same routine.  This is what I mean by being in an idle state.  It's as if I am truly not living, experiencing, THRIVING. 

Perhaps because frustration lingers in my heart.  I am not only frustrated with myself, but with others around me.  What a barrier to love.  The love that transforms, restores and revives.  The love that does not fail.

This week is going to be interesting....